RESTAURANT REVIEW: Arbitrageur, Wellington

Arbitrageur
125 Featherston Street
Wellington CBD

Just in case you were unaware, 'arbitrage' is the practise of buying an item (usually stocks or currency) in one market and selling it for a higher price in another, making a profit from the difference between the two. Those who engage in arbitrage are known as 'arbitrageurs'.

This bit of information is considerably more interesting than the meal I had at this restaurant. 

Don't get me wrong, it wasn't mind-numbingly boring in the same way that say, Avatar was, it just completely failed to blow me away. The food was nice, the service was adequate and the atmosphere was fine. But that's just it, I can't think of anything that really stood out for me about this experience that would make me want to recommend it whole-heartedly to someone. Apart from the wine list, and more on that later.

Walking in on a Friday night off a busy Featherston Street, I was greeted by a warm handshake, a friendly smile and was whisked away to my seat. Actually that's what I would have liked. Instead I had to wander cautiously well into the restaurant before anyone realised I was there. No matter, after that I was quickly (almost off-handedly) shown to my seat and given a menu and the wine list.

Ah, the wine list. The first time I had seen it was after a sumptuous degustation at Martin Bosley's and it was no less impressive given that this time I was sober. There is an excellent selection of wines on offer - well organised with a range of budgets and tastes in mind. 

The food? Well it was alright. I began with the Pâté de Tête (pig's head pâté), which was served with brioche, Dijon mustard, cornichons and a pickled onion. For mains, I chose Roast Poitrine of Pork, which was incredibly tender but was a little salty and a bit overpowered by the dried cherries. Both courses were accompanied by bread, which was, well, fine.

Before I get to dessert, let me talk a bit about the service because the two are linked. On the positive side, they weren't bothering me every three minutes asking me how my meal was (which is a pet hate of mine). However I never got the impression that the staff were enthused with what they were serving; they described it, but didn't seem interested in selling it. I think this lack of enthusiasm showed particularly with the way the order was taken - the waiter had to come back and re-confirm it, as if the thought had become bored with life and committed suicide halfway to the kitchen.

The atmosphere? Usual for somewhere like this. The lights were fairly dim (either an intentional effect or a by-product of requiring electricity to keep the waiters awake) and the music was made up of inoffensive remixes of music I had heard before (and would hear again as it was on its third loop in the 90 minutes I was there).

Anyway, dessert. It took quite a while for the waiters to realise that I was sitting with neither plates nor wine in front of me. In fact, I swear I heard one of them give a small exclamation as he realised that yes, I was still there and yes, I might want to order more food. The chocolate mousse was light, with a white chocolate interior and went well with the 2007 Mill's Reef Gimblett Gravels Port.

At the end of the night, I was pointed in the direction of the place where my bag had been stored and retrieved it myself; another testament to the indifferent service that had punctuated the evening. I left disappointed - not because anything had been wrong with the experience, but because I was expecting so much more. I haven't been particularly scathing (like I was with Voodoo) or full of praise (as with Sweet Mother's Kitchen) because Arbitrageur failed to make me fly into a rage or fall in love. It's like getting John C Reilly when you were expecting Meryl Streep - the movie's not awful, but there are no Oscars on the horizon and at least it's not Megan Fox.

I'll leave it at that, as you go off to Google who John C Reilly is (I've saved you the trouble). If I go back, I think it will be to pick up where I left off with the wine list.

Although self service might need to be an option in the future.

RESTAURANT REVIEW: Turo-Turo Philippine Cafe, Auckland

TURO-TURO PHILIPPINE CAFE
26a Mayfair Place, Glen Innes, Auckland
(09) 528 6050

As my visit to Turo-Turo (literally, 'point-point', from the stalls where people would point at their food) was my first exposure to Philippine cuisine, any review of the Cafe will inevitably involve my thoughts on Philippine food as a whole.

Philippine cuisine is like a four-car pile up between an Audi, an eighteen-wheeler, an SUV, and an old Ford Escort. Flavours and concepts that you wouldn't normally expect together combine on the plate and sucker punch the palatte. "Take savoury, add sweet" seems to be the order of the day - from sweetened spaghetti to cheese-flavoured ice cream.

Inside, it looks like a typical ethnic cafe in suburban Glen Innes - posters of the Manila skyline (complete with smog), pictures of the stalls where the cafe gets its name, and Turo-Turo t-shirts cover the walls. The tables are clean and uncovered and the service is friendly and familiar.

I start off with siopao, reminiscent of the pork buns I used to eat back in Samoa. This is my first exposure to the contradiction that is Filipino food - the pork is tasty and nicely cooked with (maybe) a hint of vinegar, contrasted completely by the syrupy sweet gravy and the sweet doughy bun that surrounds it. Delicious and supposed to be eaten as a side but the size of them (almost as big as my hand) together with the sweetness makes me wonder if I made a mistake ordering a mains. 

Nevertheless, I push on with the Pinoy Spaghetti - (sweet) pasta topped with ground beef and cheese, with a piece of garlic bread and a Joyful Chicken drumstick. The garlic bread is unremarkable (been there, had that territory) and the pasta, although cooked perfectly, just tastes like spaghetti bolognese with sugar added. The star of the dish though, is the Joyful Chicken. The chicken skin is crispy, with a salty/sweet coating. The meat underneath is juicy and for once I don't feel like I need a roll of paper napkins to mop up the grease from fried chicken. Damn, really should have just had that!

After seeing some of the desserts on the Cafe's Facebook page, I had to make room for the Brazo de Mercedes, a meringue dessert similar to a roulade, with a custard and almond filling. After the contrasting flavours of the previous two courses I expect it to be served with a fillet of beef on top but alas, no, just whipped cream. It's a light ending to a filling and reasonably priced meal.

I was very happy with my first foray into the food of the Philippines, thanks to Turo-Turo, and will definitely be back. I would recommend it to anyone who wants a well-priced meal with a few friends in simple, friendly surroundings.

One last note: I saw on the menu that Turo-Turo offers sirloin, chips, and salad if you 'don't feel like Filipino'. I would politely suggest to anyone who orders steak and chips at a Filipino cafe to rethink their choice... 

...right before I take them out and shoot them.

Alexander McQueen homage of the day

50,000 Gummi Bears. 

Worth. Every. One.

[via]

Sunday Review: Ironique, Mt Eden

448 Mt Eden Road, Auckland City

A couple of disclaimers before I get into the substance of the review. First, one of my dear friends, Fred, works at Ironique and it was initially for that reason alone that I went there last weekend. Secondly, I went there last weekend so this review is a little late, but I did take copious notes.


The first thing that hit me about Ironique was how busy the place was. I found myself secretly wishing the party of two would order so that I could make sure I had a table for brunch. The seating at the front is a bit intimate but there is plenty of room at the back of the cafe and a courtyard which is split into covered and uncovered sections. 


[digression: for some reason autocorrect wanted to change 'cafe' into 'chafe']


The second thing that hit me was the decor. The cafe features iron and metal knick-knacks throughout, including in the bathroom. Having a theme and featuring it throughout isn't necessary, so it's nice when a place goes the extra mile. 


Fred had recommended the mushrooms, but being contrary I decided to go for the baked beans. I also ordered a latte (because I'm back in Auckland and that's what I drink, so there) and, not dissimilar to a falcon pouncing on a small mammal, found a table near the courtyard door.


Looking around I saw a number of groups who must use Ironique for their regular coffee catch ups. From the scraps of conversation that I couldn't help but eavesdrop on, the cafe has a good amount of regular business and returning customers, which is always a good sign. 


I should take the time to point out the one thing that distracted from the otherwise good vibe of the place - the fact that the door to the courtyard was left open by both staff and customers alike as they went through. I, for one, can't stand doors that are left open unless they are supposed to be left open and so I closed it almost every time it was left open. Given Auckland's recent cold snap it's amazing how quickly the cold can get in. It can be a bit of a pain for people to close doors every time they open them (we're not all like the aliens from X-Com) but for people sitting  at or near the door it can make a big difference.


My latte arrived first, and a bit of a wait is understandable when a) the place is as busy as it is; and b) it's this good. It also came with an extra - Fred had included a Samoan expletive. As far as coffee art goes, this is gold.


Partway through my coffee my brunch arrived; baked beans, chorizo, ciabatta and poached eggs. Okay, I can take or leave beans generally but these were fantastic for one simple reason: they bake their own beans instead of tipping them out of a can. It's extra effort on their part but it makes so much difference to the overall taste of the dish. The eggs were just runny enough and the chorizo had a good amount of heat. I got the distinct impression that this was a cafe that cared about what goes in front of its customers. 


There is also a good amount of food on display at the counter if nothing on the menu takes your fancy. I've had only the carrot cake so far and if you're partial to it, you won't be disappointed.


One more thing: I was asked once if my meal was okay. This is probably the most appropriate number of times to be asked that question, if at all. One of my pet dislikes about eating out is when you're asked that question several times during the meal - it's almost as if the chef and waiter pin their entire self worth on your satisfaction and need constant validation (a la Monty Python's Dirty Fork sketch). It's worse when it's asked just as you've taken a bite and you feel you have to hastily swallow so you can answer. 


It's good to see that people moved around tables quickly, didn't hover, and gave you just 
enough attention to let you know they were there but not so much that you felt like how those voice actors at Armageddon must feel when they just want to eat their lunch in peace.


Yes one of my friends works there but I genuinely enjoyed eating at Ironique. From the number of regulars there, so do a lot of others.

Farewell, arteries

I present the 'Merica Burger.

“100 percent ground bacon plus thick-cut bacon, a sunny-side-up egg, our new ‘bacon island’ dressing, all topped with bacon cheddar cheese.”

What *is* bacon cheddar cheese?


[via] 

Good morning, intenets

Happy Fourth of July, Americans!

Because it is now the Fourth of July in America, which is why I didn't say this yesterday.

[neatorama]

Chewsday of the day

Happy Chewsday! It's new.


Chocolate chip cookies? Yeah, you've been doing it wrong all along. Here's the right way, thanks to the people at CHOW.

You're doing it wrong of the day

That method you're using to make a peanut butter and jam sandwich? Well it's WRONG.


[CHOW]

Ridiculous cake is ridiculous

Insanity. Creamy, cakey insanity.

[nerdilicious]

Whatisthisidonteven of the day

From the company that gave us a bunless burger, KFC Philippines presents a burger with the cheese on top of the bun.


[foodbeast]

Midnight snack

This. Barbeque. Is. Happening. No. Matter. What.


[reddit]

Cutting edge chocolate of the day

Aucklander Lisa Cruse cut her gum on a piece of glass she claims was in a Kit Kat she had at a hotel in Queenstown.


Nestle's Communications Manager Maurice Gunnell has expressed concern at the find, saying that the company factories employ a strict 'no glass' policy.


They intend to ask Ms Cruse if she was comfortable sending the fragment to an independent laboratory for testing.


[stuff]

Morning te-coffee

Coffee soda, from Suntory in Japan.

Let me say this again: Coffee. Soda.

[rocketnews]

Goodnight, Kiwis

Necronomicon? More like Necronomnomnom, amirite?

I'll just leave this here.

[source: nerdcore]

How to of the day

Courtesy of Gordon Ramsay, perfect scrambled eggs.

btw creme fraiche is simultaneously the most glorious and the most evil thing in the Universe.

Bruno Hasselhoff of the day

Dafuq did I just watch?


[source: jezebel]

Calorific menu item of the day

Hot on the heels of Burger King's US release, Ollies in Auckland's Royal Oak is adding a bacon sundae, today only.


You're welcome.


[source: nzherald]